To Beloved Conductor John Wilson: Eugene O’Neill and My Old Boss, Classic Film/Stage Director Rouben Mamoulian

From December, 2018. John Wilson, fire of my loins: You are a true musician, you command the finest magical mechanism Western Civilization has ever invented: the symphony orchestra, and you do this for a living. All life is asking you to do is to groove on it, and the fact that I’ll be continuing to make love to you long distance indefinitely.

Now, there are far more interesting exercises in the world of Schenkerian analysis  (kidding, kidding!) than one huffy American ex-porn actress taking the piss out of a popular middle-ranking, BBC-scripted, English conductor… If it weren’t for the fact that ex-porn actress happens to have fallen in love with aforementioned Conductor and longs for him regularly. Therefore she takes Conductor’s pronouncements a little more seriously, a little more discerningly than she would, say, the pronouncements of her own musical compatriots—Alsop, Tilson Thomas, Mauceri etc… Additionally, Conductor reveals in his public statements more about himself than I think he’d prefer, John.

So as much as I’d enjoy ragging you for the impudent (and ultimately self-revealing) remarks you made about Mrs Bernstein and Mrs Coates, I really should finally get down to the one single thing (aside, of course, from your tearass tempi, your overuse of percussion, your rushing of singers, your astonishing lack of color in certain critical pieces) that has bugged me since the day I first encountered it: your juvenile dismissal of my old boss, film/stage director Rouben Mamoulian, and his creative contribution to the original 1943 production of Oklahoma! Now, I know you were only riffing off info you got from some book or Andre Previn, who likely socialized with The Old Man when they were both at MGM. But, as I mentioned in an old posting, of all his stage and screen work The Old Man liked to talk about, the one he liked to talk about the most was Oklahoma! And I turned out to be his perfect audience, because early on I’d confessed to him that I was a big Rodgers & Hammerstein fan. (Filipinos are big Rodgers & Hammerstein fans, for obvious reasons.)

But before I get to the point about Oklahoma! I have to tell you a side—though relevant—story about Mamoulian and Eugene O’Neill.

John and MamoulianRouben Mamoulian and John Wilson at around the same age (40), 80 years apart.


MAMOULIAN’S AND MY EUGENE O’NEILL STORY

This is the second story Mamoulian ever told me back in 1978 when he was 81 and I was 23, which he told me in a way that was flattering as hell, which was he didn’t ask if I knew who Eugene O’Neill was, although I did say “Wow” at the mention of the name, so he might have sized up my interest that way, and just went right into the story.

Seems that when he was living an emigre’s life in New York, trying to make a go of it in stage work, he scored his greatest career triumph to date: The Theater Guild wanted him to direct a play by Eugene O’Neill. Now, O’Neill had already won the Pulitzer and he’d already had several successes, not to mention his other new play, Strange Interlude, was already generating a lot of pre-opening night buzz, so we’re talking King of 1928 Broadway here. O’Neill agrees to meet Mamoulian in his hotel room (that is to say, O’Neill’s hotel room. It seems like the best stories about O’Neill take place in hotel rooms) to talk over any directorial concerns O’Neill, the playwright, might have, and if he has any advice to give this youngster concerning his play.

“Actually, Mr O’Neill,” says Mamoulian, trying to sound like himself at thirty, you know, the brash but confident whiz-kid, “I know exactly how to fix your play.”

“You will change not a word. Not a word!” says O’Neill. And here The Old Man doesn’t bother to actually imitate O’Neill, although in time I heard him do some good impressions of other people, mostly actors.

“Look here, Mr O’Neill,” says young Mamoulian, opening the bound script of Marco Millions that he brought with him. “I can show you exactly where the speeches slow the play down, and where we can achieve the same ends using action. Here—” And here The Old Man imitates taking a blue pencil and gleefully slashing a diagonal line across a rejected page like editors do— “—and here—” He goes on to recreate his turning the pages of the script one at a time— “and here—here—here—” with a slash! slash! slash! And all the time I’m thinking with a kind of growing horror: You CUT Eugene O’Neill!!!?

“But in the end,” Mamoulian assures me, “he saw that I was right, and we got along splendidly.”

But that’s not the end of the story. About a year after Mamoulian and I go our separate ways, I get a chance to attend opening night of Marco Millions at Berkeley Stage Company up in the Bay Area, as the plus-one of some guy I was seeing. This was around the time BSC was on its “classics” kick, making it clear in news and ads and publicity sheets that this wasn’t just any old O’Neill revival, this was an extra-special homage to the master playwright of our great theatrical heritage. Scenes cut from the 1928 production had been restored in order that this fruit of O’Neill’s genius be presented intact and full; Mamoulian’s name was hardly mentioned.

Well, I watch this big lumbering thing, right through the parts that dragged on and on with their interminable speeches about the redistribution of wealth and so on, and I’m thinking, this must be where he cut, here— Then here— And here  And almost like he’s whispering in my ear “See? See?” I realize that The Old Man was right to make the cuts, and that Marco Millions probably could have been a fine piece of theater if they’d stuck to the original opening night version.

But I swear, it was not on my mind to argue this during lobby talk after the curtain. The big thing on my mind was that I had the perfect story to share at this particular time, in this particular space, and yeah, I wanted to share it. I was with the guy who brought me, a cokehead freelance lighting designer who was always hitting up people for jobs. Together we went up to the artistic directors, a married couple, my date immediately starting in with the whole buttering up thing, you know, You look fabulous what have you been doing to yourself, etc etc etc.

I break in with something like, “You know, I have a great story about this play I got straight from (and here I made sure to stress the second syllable like he preferred) Rouben Mamoulian and how he worked with—”

And here the guy, my date, takes me aside and mutters as urgently but tenderly as is possible for him, “Sweetheart, would you please shut up while I’m talking business.”

Reader, I did.

So everyone, this is the first time—the very first time—in thirty-eight years I’m telling this story.

And you, Tom Stocker. Just for that, I regret having given you the most explosive blowjob of your life, the one that made you howl like a wolf.


FULL DRESS // A gifted mesmerist—a sinister composer—a naive young conductor from the north…inspired by an episode from the life of Rachmaninoff // DOWNLOAD FREE BOOK POSTER

Ralph Vaughan Williams’s “Greensleeves” Conducted by Sir John Barbirolli and Some Natter Between My Beloved John Wilson and Edward Seckerson; Plus Monty Python, Round the Horne and Polari

From June 2023: Sorry for my shaky handwriting but while listening to this I had a fantasy that gave me the giggles: John being interviewed by my favorite ohne palones—prime purveyors of the gay-gypsy-theatrical patois called polariJulian and Sandy. Played of course by the inimitable Hugh Paddick and Kenneth Williams on Round the Horne. (This more-than-usual musical episode of Kenneth Horne’s 1967 radio show also includes Rambling Syd Rumpo, the Fraser Hayes 4 singing off-key not on purpose, and the screamingly funny takeoff sketch, “Young Horne with a Man”.)


Now John, John / Glorious John, I know that you know, and I know that you know that I know, that my long-distance lovemaking to you is being observed by a few; not many, just a few. So this rundown is for them, love:

In this very-recently posted pod chat with London-based culture maven Edward Seckerson, John talks about his idol, conductor Sir John Barbirolli; von Karajan; Leonard Bernstein; French romantic music of the early 20th century; conducting at Glyndebourne; reviving the Sinfonia of London; winning that BBC thingie for his Korngold Symphony (and confirming what I surmised in my review re his “austere” sound vs “chocolate sauce”); his other Korngold recording, the violin concerto, also with son vieil ami Andrew Haveron; Richard Rodney Bennett‘s compositional journey of self-discovery; and what we’re all waiting for, what’s up with The John Wilson Orchestra (seems like that psychic flash I had in April 2020 has proven true).

Here are the main points I took away from this podcast: “What I do try to do as a conductor is carry my sound around with me… It’s almost—I don’t really feel comfortable talking about because you know music is basically a doing thing and not a talking thing… My deepest musical creed is wrapped up with how an orchestra sounds…” Which pretty much confirms what I’ve suspected all this time about him.

John, fire of my loins, I respect your process.

Now, as heard on Monty Python:

Fantasia on “Greensleeves”
Ralph Vaughan Williams, composer
Barbirolli Conducts English String Music
RCA, 1963 first issue
The Sinfonia of London
John Barbirolli, conductor

23 JUNE 2020 UPDATE: Here’s Barbirolli again from that same album conducting Ralph Vaughan Williams’s Fantasia from a Theme by Thomas Tallis, which my beloved John Wilson will be conducting The Phiharmonia Orchestra in, in an online concert on 17 July.

EXTRA! Here are 2 interviews with John from BBC 2 Radio: one (8 min long) from 24 April 2016 with Michael Ball, and one (4 min long) from 4 November 2013 with Steve Wright.


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Ravel’s Daphnis et Chloé Now in the Hands of My Beloved John Wilson

From November 2023: As promised by John in “My Beloved Conductor John Wilson’s Lockdown Listening List: Keely Smith, Teddy Wilson, Ravel, Walton, Elgar, Brahms, Ireland, Debussy, Peter Ackroyd; Plus Yusef Lateef”: Once it became apparent that we would all be spending our days at home, I decided to embark on a project I had been putting off for years: correcting all of the many thousands of errors in Ravel’s masterpiece, Daphnis et Chloe. I soon became thoroughly absorbed in this rather epic task and ended up completing a brand new edition of the whole ballet which I will be recording next year for Chandos.

Well, here it is. Very promising indeed. (Thousands, huh?)


Part 01 // Part 02 // Part 03 // Part 04 // Part 05 // Part 06 // Part 07 // Part 08 // Part 09 // Part 10 // Part 11 // Part 12 // Part 13 // Part 14

EXTRA! John Discusses Maurice Ravel with Francois Dru!

EXTRA EXTRA! This schlemiel named Hurwitz hates this recording and loathes John. “Of course it’s sexless,” he fumes. “Look who we’re dealing with!” Hilarious.


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Just for My Beloved Conductor John Wilson for His Upcoming 52nd Birthday: The Story at Last of How My Parents Met and Married


Looking ahead to May 25John, I have three stories in my repertoire I’ve been saving all these years for that one special person. Not Mister Grumble, not Mamoulian, certainly not Steve Gyllenhaal. You. You read the first one, the story of how I met agent-turned-producer Michael Linnit and had my first orgasm at the St Regis. This is the second. (The third is the story of how I got my job as Night Solfeggist at ASCAP. I’ll tell that one this summer.)

My mother at 19 looked just like this when the Japs occupied Manila. You figure out that part of her story.

I’m writing it now when I have a few minutes. Check back between when you finish up with the Royal Scottish National Orchestra and before you start at Glyndebourne. It’ll be here on your birthday. I’m still in love with you and want to give you nice things.

[more of My Dad, Who Shares a Birthday with My Beloved John Wilson]

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Conductor John Wilson Among the Women of Glyndebourne’s 2019 Cendrillon; Plus a Couple of 2-Degree Connections to TV’s Frasier, 2023; and John’s Attitude Toward His Female Singers in General

Connection number one: The star of the classic TV show Frasier, Kelsey Grammer, starred in Man of La Mancha at the London Coliseum in 2019. His co-star in that show was popular British TV actor Nicholas Lyndhurst, who played his Sancho Panza and now plays his “old Oxford pal” on the new Frasier show. The Joe Darion-Dale Wasserman-Mitch Leigh stage musical was co-produced by venerable (and gorgeous then, gorgeous still and always) talent agent-turned-producer Michael Linnit, who gave me my first orgasm one July night in 1973 at the St Regis Hotel in New York City, New York.

Connection number two: Also in the cast of the Coliseum’s La Mancha was soprano Danielle de Niese. De Niese’s married to the chairman of the Glyndebourne Festival Opera. Just like late Met mezzo Maria Ewing who was also married to a bigwig (and not just any old bigwig but the hoity-toity SIR Peter Hall which made her a lady, Lady Hall), the ladies like John well enough. And he likes them well enough.

Even “exotic” ladies, as my bonny John described Detroit-born Maria Ewing. Danielle de Niese is a mix of Dutch/Sri Lankan; Ewing’s mix Dutch/African. (I am, if anyone’s interested, a mix of Filipino/Catalonian/Chinese/Irish—Eurasian, in other words, like these fellow lovelies.)

So should this make me jealous? Ridiculous! Pay no attention to the painting in my gallery.

Oh, who am I kidding? Hold my jacket, Vinny. [more after dinner, making Romanian goulash…]

Okay, I’m back. The trick to making good Romanian goulash, by the way, is to let the carrots boil long enough to get soft as stew. Cheap paprika is fine to use but dump it in, it’s never strong enough for the recipe.

Now to fighting for the man I love. After satisfying myself thoroughly, body and soul, with that very lively fantasy (taking place—this is where it went in my head—on the Mean Streets of the Lower East Side—between Vinny the Sardine’s kid sister Teresa, a girl sporting a crucifix and a great right hook—and a bottle blonde puttana, calls herself Lolita) I need to point out John’s propensity for let’s say not being at one with his female singers.

I have here, case in point, a young one named Sierra Boggess in her rendering of that classic song of girl power we all sang while bounding youthfully down the street—from the BBC Proms, 2010: “I Have Confidence”. You stay and listen. I can’t even listen all the way to the end, John and his O just drown out pobrecita, who I have enough sympathy for already, as back in 2018 she had to play the fall guy in the BBC’s cockamamie plan to appear racially woke—while being able to stock their shows with free, unseasoned talent from the local inner city arts school (a very common tactic in the States) for that West Side Story debacle of theirs.

In fact, this subject is making me so mad I need to sweeten the moment—so I’ve decided to sic one of the girls on my darling… Which one will it be? Petula…? Dusty…? Okay, here’s a song by a particular girl singer I get a particular kick out of: Neil Diamond’s “The Boat That I Row” sung by Lulu! I’m singing this song dancing to your picture, mi amor.


John Wilson Glyndebourne 1Above John at Glyndebourne, 2019: “Vous êtes mon prince charmant” from Act III of Jules Massenet’s comic opera.

Now, about the 2019 Cendrillon: At the intermission talk with Cendrillon‘s director Fiona Dunn, my beloved John Wilson, mezzo Kate Lindsey, and soprano Danielle de Niese, the topic of debate was, What should Prince Charming look like in the 21st century?


Says John to the lovelies pictured above: “I think having Prince Charming as Massenet stipulated, it fits beautifully within the whole kind of sonic picture of the whole thing. It’s not a piece that you could say fits on one musical plane, it’s got lots of colors. It’s one of the most colorful pieces he ever wrote… When I said I was doing this piece to people, they would say, Oh yeah, that’s a nice light sort of sweet little piece. It’s not a sweet little piece, it’s a big piece, there’s always another layer to get to and there’s always more detail to explore, always more depth every time. It’s not lightweight…”

EXTRA! The most John Wilsonish piece in Cendrillon.

“Marche des princesses”
from Cendrillon, Act IV
Jules Massenet, composer
Academy of St Martin in the Fields
Neville Marriner, conductor
Capriccio, 1997


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On Conductor John Wilson’s Full Dress and The First Porn Movie I Ever Did, 1

From 2019: For those of you who know that, as well as being a retired porn actress, I also write porn for pleasure (actually genteel erotica but you know and I know it’s porn, lady porn, but PORN), Full Dress being a riff on my old boss Rouben Mamoulian’s classic The Song of Songs—you know, the one where Marlene Dietrich has a rich would-be composer for a husband and a young, sensitive, bespectacled conductor for a lover, inspiring them both to artistic heights through her Mighty Marlene Power. Oh, baby. This is the movie that inspired me to emulate you in my youth.

But just so you don’t go on thinking this is some kind of fanblog (really, I’m not a fan*, just crazy in love with the bloke below) I thought I’d spend a posting to tell you all how I got my first gig in pictures.

John ExposedAbove John’s arousingly exposed suspender: Nina Simone sings Cole Porter’s “All of You” just for my wild Geordie lad.


This happened in San Francisco—in the 70s a paradise for the sexually adventurous—and coming after the time I worked as classic film director Rouben Mamoulian‘s amanuensis, which was after the time I posed nude for a blind sculptor in St-Paul-de-Vence, which was after the time I danced topless in a mob-run bar in Red Hook, which was after the time I was the night solfeggist at ASCAP

So anyway. One lovely summer evening about six weeks after I hit the city I went with a (legit) actress friend to a house party up on Potrero Hill, mostly because she enticed me with the information that the party would be featuring a hot tub. (Am such a pushover for hot tubs.) Well, at the party there was this cute but obvious older guy from London (trimmed ginger beard, open shirt, bead bracelet—no one goes California like the English) named Paul, who owned the house and who invited me seulement for a session of coke+quaaludes and a nice soak later, after all the other guests have left. Then he gave me his card. (This was only the second time a man ever gave me his business card before we had sex, and it wouldn’t be the last)…

Part 2 “Zombie Love Slave” here.
Part 3 “Sausalito Hot Tub” here.
Part 4 “Lovelace” here.

*No, really, I’m in love with John but he plows through Gershwin like a bull moose and treats Bernstein like Bernstein’s Saruman and he’s Frodo. How could any red-blooded American woman countenance such effrontery to our national treasures?**

**He does, however, conduct Elgar and Vaughan Williams like an angel.


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“They Call the Wind Mariah” by Lerner + Loewe Sung by the Smothers Brothers, Rescuing a Fine Song from the Smelliest, Most Offensive Movie Musical Ever

Of course there’s no “h” in the actual title but I’m putting it in anyway to alert singers to the long vowel because the money-grubbing whore who wrote the lyrics to this Broadway musical standard didn’t give two shits for singers.

Above: After some silliness, the boys deliver a splendid rendition of the Frederick Loewe standard, “They Call the Wind Mariah” from Paint Your Wagon (Broadway, 1951)

I, however, have a lot of affection and admiration for Berlin-born-and-trained composer Frederick Loewe, who wrote the most tuneful, singable melodies on Broadway, up there with Richard Rodgers and Jerome Kern. Loewe was right not to want to have anything to do with the big-screen disaster, Paint Your Wagon, which plowed on without him (Paramount, 1969), messing up Josh Logan, Paddy Chayefsky(!), Jean Seberg, Lee Marvin, Clint Eastwood, et al, in its trail…

The only way to read the 1969 film (and I don’t recommend watching it for pleasure ever ever ever, not even for yummy Clint) is to look at it like a late-60s hippie festival, complete with trees, mud, and crazy sex. (You know, like Woodstock…) The absolutely unreal pluralism of the background characters—Jews, Italians, whites (but no blacks), Chinese dressed in brocade with their wives(!?) all living in this dirty mining camp (a dirty mining camp where men politely doff their hats to white women) peacefully together—is another hippie fantasy, with a dollop of Chayefsky the liberal (of Marty and Network fame) added.

The one good thing in this pile of offal is the song, “They Call the Wind Mariah”, sung incongruously by Harve Presnell; but beautifully and hauntingly here by, of all people, the Smothers Brothers, the shining jokester-balladeer heroes of my youth. (Adding to their luster: as wartime US Army brats, they spent part of their childhood in the Philippines.)

Here’s hoping you haven’t watched/heard Paint Your Wagon. If you have, and the Andre Previn interpolations made you (like me) sick*, here are two lovely selections from the pen of Frederick Loewe, rendered by my bonny John Wilson and his various orchestras:

*…And that blustering Hollywood chickenshit should’ve punched Woody Allen in the nose.


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Valentine’s Day 2024 for My Bonny Lad Across the Ocean, Conductor John Wilson

February 14. Greetings of the day, my love. This is my gift to you this year: A sexy song by Erik Satie, plus a mashup of you conducting Vaughan Williams’s “Sea” Symphony in Birmingham with the classic print by Hokusai (1760-1849), “The Great Wave off Kanagawa”, which is actually getting some likes over at my DeviantArt gallery.


Hosukai and John Wilson

Above the mashup of Hosukai + John conducting Vaughan Williams’s “Sea” Symphony, find counter-tenor Yoshikazu Mera’s exquisite rendering of Erik Satie’s cafe melody, “Je te veux”.


Ars gratia artis. Or art for the sake of the artists*. I love you today and all days.

*Ars propter artificum.

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My Beloved English Conductor John Wilson’s Concert Dates 27 January – 28 July, 2024 Now That Intermusica Has Ceased Publishing His Schedule

Since John’s management has long ago ditched his site johnwilsonconductor.com I went over to Bachtrack to find this info, and will probably end up going there and elsewhere evermore for more info on my bonny lad’s—w or w/o his Sinfonia of London—performances. (I also have John on Google Alert, plus I donate to the Royal College and the Royal Academy to get their email newsletters, plus I follow the Sinfonia and RTE on Facebook…plus if he’s scheduled to play movie music somewhere I can get that info from Juliet Rózsa…)

Know why I like this picture? ‘Cause there’s a devil face in the red vainly trying to get at my beloved through the impenetrable white light of my love. So there, John. I told you The Queen of Heaven had her eye on you

UPDATE! Some kind soul in the UK (probably my travelling writer friend Helen Ducal, and if it is you, Helen, thanks!) subscribed me a few days ago to the John Wilson & Sinfonia of London website, which promptly sent me the ballot ClassicFM put out for best classical recordings of 2023. So okay, I voted for his Vaughan Williams but NOT his compleat Oklahoma! out of respect for the memory of my old boss, Rouben Mamoulian, who John—prompted I’m sure by the BBC—saw fit to throw a little shade on when he conducted R&H back in 2010. (He’s still my guy, though. I’m sooo used to snarky artistic types.) So I’ll probably be getting the SoL schedule as they know it. But I still have to hunt up his other appearances.


The dates link to the ticket sites. The other highlights link to available recordings.

Sat 27 Jan 2024 19:30
Sheldonian Theatre
Oxford, UK
Oxford Philharmonic Orchestra
Leonard Elschenbroich (cello)

___

Fri 09 Feb 2024 19:30
Royal Academy of Music
London, UK
RAM Symphony Orchestra
Kasparas Mikužis (piano)

___

Fri 01 Mar 2024 19:30
National Concert Hall
Dublin, IE
National Symphony Orchestra
Peter Moore (trombone)

  • Lily Boulanger: D’un matin de printemps which my beloved conducted the RAM in last October
  • Joe Chindamo: Ligeia [Concerto for Trombone and Orchestra] the European premiere of this Australian composer’s work
  • Gustav Holst: The Planets op.32 (John-NYOGB)

___

Fri 19 Apr 2024 19:30
Usher Hall
Edinburgh, UK
Royal Scottish National Orchestra
Alice Coote (mezzo-soprano)

___

Sat 20 Apr 2024 19:30
Glasgow Royal Concert Hall
Glasgow, UK
Royal Scottish National Orchestra
Alice Coote (mezzo-soprano)

___

09 Jun – 28 Jul 2024
Glyndebourne
Lewes, East Sussex UK


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A Sexy NYC Memory to Celebrate My 3rd Anniversary of Falling in Love with Conductor John Wilson; Plus the BBCSO Doing Elgar’s Bach Fantasia; and Theatre of Blood (United Artists, 1973)

From 4 May, 2021. In one of my old postings (“On Conductor John Wilson’s Full Dress and The First Porn Movie I Ever Did, 1”) I said something about a certain hot tub party being only the second time a man ever gave me his business card before we had sex… Well, this was the first.

It happened one evening in July, 1973. I was 18. I had just gotten that job as night solfeggist at ASCAP only a couple of weeks earlier, which is in itself a very interesting story I’ll have to tell you one of these days. Only now let’s get back to me walking down Broadway from 63rd. I loved walking home to the Village after work on a summer evening, when all of midtown was still buzzy with life and good times. After the night shift, some of my fellow solfeggists would go across the street to O’Neal’s Balloon to drink with the fancy Lincoln Center crowd (here’s my own favorite table showing up in Annie Hall), but I got a bigger kick being below 54th with all the theater people. On this particular evening I was approaching 46th…and right there on the corner of 46th stood a really good-looking guy, tall and blond and nicely dressed, who seemed to be scoping out one by one all the passers-by. For some reason he lit upon me. He got my attention. Then he asked me if I knew where a good jazz club could be found, the way you might ask any passer-by about a mailbox or the way to the Empire State Building… I told him I was new in town. Then he suggested we (“we”!) buy a newspaper and sit down somewhere and check the listings together. Oh, I was game. My first New York adventure! We went across the street to Howard Johnson’s where he bought me a hamburger and told me about himself. He told me he was an agent. He’d just put his client on the plane that day—his client having just been on The Dick Cavett Show promoting his new film, a comedy-horror flick that’s now a classic—and he himself was going back to London in the morning. He told me his client’s name, which I recognized at once, and then he gave me his card, which I kept for years until I gave it to an actor friend who said he was “looking for a UK rep”… Then he asked me about myself, all the nice polite questions a man’ll ask you beforehand… But we also talked about show business, shows, show music. I told him I liked Man of La Mancha. Having found no jazz clubs worth going to that night, we left HoJo’s and walked over to 5th Avenue, where we strolled back to his hotel room at the St Regis. I was ready for anything, expecting nothing. Even when he pulled the line, “Let’s get out of these hot clothes, shall we?” with that gorgeous limey accent of his, I still wasn’t sure we were on the road to making it…until we started making it. At that point we hadn’t even kissed. But oh, how he made up for it! I wasn’t a virgin, but here was the first man I ever slept with who actually knew how to take his time pleasuring a woman. By the time I was under him, gazing down at the back of his incredibly sexy legs, an electric shock went through me, and for the first time in my life, I orgasmed. So that’s the story of my first New York hookup. We parted in the morning, wishing each other well, and I even made it back to the boarding house in time for breakfast. A perfect sexual encounter with a happy ending.

I’m telling you this, John, because what Michael Linnit made me feel that night is nothing compared to how you made me feel when you conducted Elgar’s Bach Fantasia in Sydney three years ago. I’m not kidding. I had just fallen in love with you when I saw you shimmy to a Jule Styne tune in some video… But this time (it was about 2 weeks later) there was only you and the music on the radio. I’m not even crazy about Elgar, I was waiting for your Prokofiev. But I was so keyed up—for the past couple of weeks I had been vibrating with desire for you—that when a certain chord was played in the Elgar, a wave rolled through me, it was just so yummy… But that wasn’t all. As I lay there gasping, a little voice in my head went, You fool! Don’t you remember who’s doing this? And so I came again, this orgasm coming over me like a wave meant to drown…and I reached for you and knocked the lamp off the night table.

One day I’ll tell you about the other times (Vaughan Williams, Richard Rodgers). But I just wanted to let you know now how much you’ve meant to me, how much you still mean, even when you’re not wearing full dress.

Elgar GirlAbove Cantara and her lust: Elgar’s Bach Fantasia played by the BBCSO under Leonard Slatkin. And here’s the score.


FULL DRESS // A gifted mesmerist—a sinister composer—a naive young conductor from the north…inspired by an episode from the life of Rachmaninoff // DOWNLOAD FREE BOOK POSTER

More Crib Notes Just for My Beloved John Wilson, Conductor: “La Borinqueña” in Steven Spielberg’s West Side Story (2021) Plus My Own Brush With the FALN

The scene pictured/heard below is one of the reasons Steven Spielberg’s West Side Story (20th Century Studios, 2021) is the film version that resonates with me more than any other film version that ever was, or will be.

La Borinquena in West Side Story

Above the Sharks: The soundtrack version of the anthem of Puerto Rican independentistas, “La Borinqueña”. And here’s the same anthem in a sweeter version


For one thing, the music remains intact. In fact, the music is better arranged and better placed in WSS2021 than in the 1961 version. More on that later.

For another, the script—meaning the dialogue, character arc, exposition, etc—is far, far better in the hands of Tony Kushner, not only a brilliant scenarist, but a stone New Yorker of my generation, and one of the few writers who knows how to take a big chunk of America in all its complexity and give it back to us in digestible form, no mean feat.

I have other reasons to like Kushner. He scripted the role my son’s godmother was most famous for—the original Angel in his stage work about the AIDS crisis (AIDS took the life of the man I was in love with, in ’91) Angels In America (picture of Sigrid Wurschmidt and Robert DiMatteo here). Here’s a sample of his chewy good dialogue. It comes right after the Sharks break into the anthem of the independentistas and exit stage right, to whistles and applause among the vecinos:

Lt Schrank (to the Jets): We’re outnumbered, boys. Thousands more are on their way…and once they’re here, they pop out kids like crazy, am I right? … Work with me, fellas! Or they’re going to drive you off your turf! … Most of the white guys who grew up in this slum climbed their way out of it. Irish, Italians, Jews… Nowadays their descendants live in nice houses and drive nice cars and date nice girls you’d want to marry. Your dads or your grandads stayed put, drinkin’ and knockin’ up some local piece who gave birth to you—the last of the Can’t-Make-It Caucasians. (beat) What’s a gang without its terrain, its turf? You’re a month or two away from finding out, one step ahead of the wrecking ball. And in this uncertain world, the only thing you can count on is me. I’m here to keep the civil peace until the last building falls. And if you boys make trouble on my turf, Riff, hand to heart, you’re headed to an upstate prison cell for a very long time. By the time you get out, this will be a shiny new neighborhood of rich people in beautiful apartments…with Puerto Rican doormen to chase trash like you away.

Okay, as exposition it’s a lee-tle too much on the nose and just a lee-tle bit too prescient. But yeah, in a little over two hundred words—really, the first big speech in this let’s face it Shakespearean play—Kushner the playwright has given us the genuine patter of a New Yorker.

[more later]


FULL DRESS // A gifted mesmerist—a sinister composer—a naive young conductor from the north…inspired by an episode from the life of Rachmaninoff // DOWNLOAD FREE BOOK POSTER

“Glen Herbertovich Ray” Plus Jazz Waltz No.2 by Shostakovich

From 1 June 2018: I dunno, watching 6 years of The Americans put me in an operational frame of mind…so I’ve been looking back at puzzling scenes and scenarios throughout my own life, trying to put the pieces together into recognizable shape…

Above: The Concertgebouw perform Dmitri Shostakovich’s fetching and popular Jazz Suite No 2 VI, Waltz II called in our house “The Spies’ Waltz” because that’s what it sounds like


For example, that strange meeting in Loring Park under the statue of 19th century Norwegian violinist Ole Bull—was that really Mr Ray getting debriefed by a State Department/CIA guy? He always struck me as a little too European for our little Midwest hidey-hole (Minneapolis) anyway, not to mention his Russian was really, yummily good. Almost everything I know about Russia and the Russian language I first learned from Mr Ray and no one else, not even Mamoulian or Anthony Burgess.

I took Russian from Mr Ray for two years (1967-69), during which time: 1) I graduated from junior to senior high; 2) Mister Grumble was drafted, sent overseas and got shot at by the Ruskies; then halfway in 3) there were the assassinations of Martin and Bobby; and then to top it all off, 4) Richard Nixon finally gets elected president. Some ride, huh? I got in on some of the weirdness of that era, this is just one little piece.


FULL DRESS // A gifted mesmerist—a sinister composer—a naive young conductor from the north…inspired by an episode from the life of Rachmaninoff // DOWNLOAD FREE BOOK POSTER

Theme and My Favorite Music from The Americans (2013-2018) and a Note on Yuri Nosenko

I cry at this scene every time.

For Nadezhda and Mikhail

From 30 May 2018. Selections:

NOTE: Yuri Nosenko was a false defector. The fact that he didn’t crack under three years of intense US interrogation satisfies me that he was a well-trained plant who was lying when he believed he was telling the truth / telling the truth when he believed his was lying. Thank you, KGB “doctors”. Why important? Philip and Elizabeth Jennings appeared on the scene the exact year he defected to America—1964. The year, too, my high school Russian teacher, Glen Herbertovich Ray (real name?) was debriefed after his own mysterious trip to the USSR.

More ruminating at The Assassinations here.

More notes on The Americans here.


FULL DRESS // A gifted mesmerist—a sinister composer—a naive young conductor from the north…inspired by an episode from the life of Rachmaninoff // DOWNLOAD FREE BOOK POSTER

My Bonny John Wilson Conducts the Orchestre de Lyon for the 2023/24 New Year

Well, well, this sounds exciting. Thanks, Juliet Rózsa!

Screening Room, SF 1979

Above: From the 1940 film The Thief of Bagdad, “The Love of the Princess”.



FULL DRESS // A gifted mesmerist—a sinister composer—a naive young conductor from the north…inspired by an episode from the life of Rachmaninoff // DOWNLOAD FREE BOOK POSTER